Book Review

One Step At a Time by Lenor Madruga

A young woman's inspiring struggle to walk again.

  This isn't a new book. It was copyrighted in 1979 and it's now in its third printing. That probably qualifies it to be called a classic among first person stories about amputation. But I had not read it until the Fall of 1997. That was my loss.

  It's the story of Lenor Madruga, wife, mother, glamorous veteran of the fashion modeling circuit, who, on the morning of her 32nd birthday, discovered a lump in her groin. The lump turned out to be a malignant chondrosarcoma attached to her pelvic bone and the treatment of choice turned out to be hemipelvectomy - the removal of half of the pelvis. And, of course, the leg goes with it.

  Hemipelvectomy is a radical procedure - fortunately, rather rare. But Lenor is a rare person also. Orthopedically, it could be said she is "worse off" than 95% of those with leg amputations but emotionally she is clearly better off than most. She is one of those glass-half-full people who manages to look on the bright side of things. In her case, although her loss was devastating and we see evidence throughout the book of her continuing battle to overcome the physical and emotional consequences of it, her initial response was a joyful realization that she was still alive. The surgery, as radical as it was, was seen as a second chance - a reprieve from a death sentence.

  "I was trying desperately to get across to my friends and family that . . . in comparison to my life, this left leg was expendable. I wanted them to be glad I was going to live, not sad because my leg was going to be amputated." But others simply couldn't grasp this. "We never considered the possibility of you losing your life. That just couldn't happen. But losing a leg, a disfigurement, my God, these things just don't happen to vivacious, pretty people like you . . " Most people who are preparing to have a limb amputated depend on their friends and family for encouragement and support. In Lenor's case, she was the one who provided support and encouragement to them. Extraordinary!

  There are other extraordinary things about Lenor. Insight for one. While waiting to be rolled into the operating room, she wrote an article she had promised to her local newspaper. The last paragraph was a pledge to herself and a notice to her friends. "People are going to react to my situation as I react to it. In other words, if I am self-pitying, others will pity me. If I consider myself an oddity, others will think me odd. I intend to continue my life with the same enthusiasm and gaiety that I'm accustomed to. All I ask is that you don't demand I keep my legs together when I dive off the diving board this summer."

  There's a lesson on almost every page. On courage and pity, after her first on-stage appearance three weeks after her surgery: She realized that, what it would take to be successful in the future is "courage to ignore my condition; courage to live with it; and courage to project to others that I was not a radically handicapped person, but a woman, who suddenly found herself saddled with a small misfortune . . . I knew that if I could accept this attitude, respect would be mine, pity would be reserved for other less fortunate individuals."

  On attractiveness: "I think women, more than men, misconceive what is beautiful to men and what is not. Women think that if you don't have perfect physical equipment - face, breasts, legs, and fanny - then men will not be attracted to you." Not so, says Lenor. If you feel attractive, you'll be attractive. "I was determined not to let the surgery blemish my feelings about myself."

  On chronic pain: "It seems that the major problem with chronic pain sufferers is that they let their pain become the central theme of their lives. . . . They begin to take drugs to relieve this aggravating pain and, very soon, they find themselves taking more and more . . . .It doesn't take the patient's subconscious long to realize that in order to get drugs he must have pain . . . and the more pain he expresses, the more relief he will get. . . . .Then after a short period of time, he begins to use his pain to manipulate. . . interpersonal relationships begin to break down." Even though Lenor became determined not to fall into this trap, ("I soon realized that if I was active . . . it would be less noticeable") her battle to avoid the false solutions drugs and alcohol promised were long and painful, but ultimately successful.

  This book has a lot going for it. It's nicely crafted and easy to read. It's both inspirational and instructional. It's a story of tragedy, acceptance, sense of humor, and determination to lead a normal life after amputation - a challenge that is only partly physical and mostly emotional. It's a story of a struggle with chronic pain and its consequences. It's a story that rings true-to-life at every turn of the page. That makes it must reading for people with significant leg amputations. It's mandatory reading for those with hemipelvectomies. And it's highly rewarding reading for everyone else. (Review by Richard Mooney, MAAF Newsletter Editor)

One Step At a Time has been translated into ten languages. It has been featured by Book of the Month and Doubleday Book Clubs and condensations have appeared in many international publications, including Readers Digest. It was named the most inspirational book of the year by both Family Circle Magazine and Religion in Media.

Order for $10.00 plus S&H ($3.00 US, $8.00 elsewhere)
Phone - (541) 582-1510
Fax - (541) 582-1220
e-mail - r12345@cdsnet.net
Visit Lenor Madruga's homepage at http://www.rogueweb.com/lenor